Learning to See in the Dark (Ch. 5-7)

Hello everyone! Hope you’re all having a great day! I’ve read chapters four to seven and here is my second reflection piece.

Upon reading chapters four to seven of The Sum of my Parts, I once again found myself shocked and even mortified. In these chapters, Olga’s abusive father had a heart attack and passed away. Now as a reader, I was happy for Olga as I believed the abuse had come to an end, but that wasn’t the case. Her brothers, Alex and Mike, along with their friends, began to rape and beat her. With this, she was also raped by a man in her neighborhood. Despite all of this, she moved out and went to law school. Later, she got married to a man named David and had little to do with her family. Even though she was removed from the abuse, she still experienced dissociations every now and again; especially, when it came be being intimate with her partner David. This put a strain on their relationship as he felt she wasn’t interested in being intimate with him. When they were intimate, she would dissociate and “leave her body”, just as she did as a child. This became an automatic response for Olga and she couldn’t control it. As I predicted in my previous post, this had affected her relationship with David and I believe this might be too much of a strain for their relationship. Untimely, I don’t know if their relationship will survive. In addition, Olga reported that she had no recollection of the abuse and rape she experienced. It’s amazing what our mind does to protect us. In Olga’s case, her mind suppressed what had happened to her deep in her unconscious, so that she could cope with the situation. Essentially, this is an unconscious maladaptive coping strategy. One day, her and David went to the theatre and saw a movie that contained a rape scene. She described having a panic attack and having to leave the theatre. After this, she had reoccurring panic attacks, nightmares, and didn’t feel safe anywhere or with anyone. Essentially, she couldn’t leave her house. She noted that she didn’t know why she felt this way. She couldn’t understand or control it. I think this would be terrifying to experience. It would be so frustrating to feel so scared and not know why. In essence, Olga’s mental health has deteriorated to the point where her quality of life is inadequate. I’m shocked at the extent to which trauma can affect a person’s mental health. Originally, I had no clue trauma could cause such chaos for a person psychologically, even unconsciously with no recollection of the event.

What do you guys think about this? Please comment below and share your thoughts!